Six Continents and Death Threats

Day: 197

Some key factors were a Argentine girl with her babymaking parts tattoooed on her back, lots of beer, a very angry German man (who had been telling us stories about time he spent in Thai jails), Valentines Day, and of course, your beautiful hero.

Put them together and what do you get?

Fun!

In the form of a very drunk German man telling me at a bar at 1am:

“If you don’t stop touching her, I am going to kill you.” (It was actully her, who kept holding my hand, kissing me, and dancing too close for what might be called friendship.)
“Seriously?” I replied.

“Get the fuck away from her.”

“How about we play Paper, Rock, Scissors? Winner backs off?” I wittily reply (or at least I think its witty.)
“I’ll fucking kill you.  No scissors or no rocks…”

Ok I think it may be time for a short reprieve.

I excuse myself to the restroom,  Stopping by a table of people  from the hostel for a quick retelling.  It turns out the German has been here for 10 days trying to hit on this girl, who works in the tourist office, and he hasn’t gotten anywhere, some say they think he is in love with her.  Sucks for him.  He brings her around and it only takes me two hours to destroy his fairytale, I was starting to see why he might be pissed off.  But still, if you you cant close a deal in 10 days what is another night going to do for you?

Now what am I to do? Chance a very intoxicated German coming after me for just another girl I have meant in just another city?

I give him a few minutes to cool off, then sneek in and invite her to head out with me to a club that some of the others are going to.  She says she’ll meet me there in a little while after she says goodbye to some friends. I jump in a taxi and head off to a huge, packed, electronic music thumping club in the middle of nowhere. Our group is quickly seperated and I am wandering the dance floor when two other Argentine hotties start talking to me.

They want to teach me to dance.  Within two minutes out on the dance floor these succubuses hands are trying to get in my pockets to steal from me.  I am having to much fun to worry though (especially since I left everything of value in the hostel locker and only had about 20 pesos ($6) spread out between my pockets).  I giggle and keep dancing with them, hoping they leave enough for cab fare back.

After an hour of the head pounding music, and shady Argentine hotties, I decide it’s time for bed.  I find that I still have most of my money, or perhaps all (can’t remember exactly how much I had to start, but it wasn’t much). I get a taxi back to the area of the hostel and walk the last two blocks towards my bed.

Guess who I run into, sans German guy? Nadia, the girl who I was getting threats about earlier! She wanders towards the hostel with me, retelling a story of how the German told her I was such a horrible guy just trying to take advantage of her.

“But I am just trying to take advantage of you.”

She giggles, gives me a good night kiss and says “If only you were staying here longer.”  She vanishes up the street back towards the bar.

I go to sleep laughing.

What a weird fucking night.